The Toxicity Toolkit – Week Six – Collecting Spoons

Week Six

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Self Care

Week Six: Collecting spoons

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Spoon Theory created by Christine Miserandino originated as a way of explaining how we each have a certain supply of energy, and really of ourselves, to deal with things in a day. People who experience more health and privilege have a greater supply of spoons, and doing things costs them fewer spoons.

Things like disability, depression, excessive workload, or personal tragedy make our spoon costs go up, and therefore we run out of spoons sooner.

It’s impossible to judge how many spoons another person has left.

The Exercise

This week pay attention to your spoons.

Examine which things or people cost you spoons, exhaust you, push you to your limits?

Examine things that replenish your spoons, or give you energy and strength. Take note of things that bring you peace.

This week, focus on self-care.

You may wonder what self-care is, or what it looks like.

Many people think of self-care as a spa day or a pampering. Unfortunately this misses the mark.

For this exercise, self-care is choosing things that replenish your spoons, and creating boundaries to help you control when you give your spoons away.

Everyone loses spoons that are beyond their control, but it’s healthy to give up fewer of them. It’s healthy to choose which spoons to give up whenever you can.

Reflect on your spoons in your journal every day. Look for ways of recognizing when you’re low on spoons before you run out. Find ways of replenishing spoons earlier.

Pay attention to the spoons of your family members. When a family member seems upset, ask them if they are losing spoons. Encourage them to replenish spoons. Help them question whether they need to give the spoons or draw boundaries.
Be open to others helping you understand your spoons.

References:

butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/

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